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Top Ten Reasons Your New Year’s Resolution To Lose Weight Will Fail

December 20th, 2007

10) One word…Chocolate! (Yum! There is always 2009!)
9) You are a proud citizen of the procrastiNATION. (There is always 2009!)
8) The exercise your trainer does does not count towards your weight loss.
7) Paying gym dues slims the wallet, not the waist line! (Have you even seen the gym since you joined?)
6) Trips to Pizza Hut was not what you meant by traveling more! (Also see reasons #2(a), #2(b), and #2(c))
5) Being more proactive does not mean eating tomorrow’s calories today!
4) Running 6 steps from your car into Wendy’s is not exercise!
3) It would be wrong to lose it, because someone else might find it!
2) (c) International Men- You are the ANTI-Beckham!!! (You’ve been known to bend it like Beckham…and break it!!)
2) (b) International Women- You want to be the newest Spice Girl…Chunky Spice!
2) (a) US Citizens- There are no hanging chads when it comes to calorie counting; every calorie counts!
1) You are so sexy, who cares!!

Entry Filed under: Essays/Tips/Lifehacks